Inviting a friend who doesn’t know God to church sounds simple, but anyone who has tried knows it isn’t easy. A hurried invitation usually gets nothing more than a polite smile. For most unbelievers, the gap between “knowing there is a church” and “believing in God” is very wide, and that gap is usually bridged by a real relationship.
This article is about the journey of building trust: from knowing each other to trusting each other, and from trust to the point where that person is willing to hear about Jesus. But first, let us be clear: people are not saved by our strategies. God Himself opens hearts; our part is to faithfully plant and water.
“I planted the seed and Apollos watered it, but God made it grow.”
– 1 Corinthians 3:6 (BSB)
Why Trust Must Come Before the Invitation
Many people think that simply inviting friends to a service will lead them to receive the Lord. Reality is often different. If people don’t yet trust you, it is hard for them to listen to the One you are introducing. On the other hand, when they have seen your love and sincerity over time, they will be more open to the gospel.
Today, many people are not hostile to faith; they are simply indifferent. Some have never had a close Christian friend. Some assume the church is only for a certain kind of person. Others do not yet see that they need God in their lives. So the journey of building trust often begins in very ordinary ways: a meal, an act of help, an honest conversation.
Four Steps in the Journey of Building Trust
Step 1: Pray for Them Every Day
“Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.”
– Colossians 4:2 (BSB)
The journey of building trust always begins with prayer, because only God can change hearts. Write down the names of a few relatives or friends who don’t know God and pray for them every day. Ask God to open their hearts, and ask the Holy Spirit to show you when and how to speak. When you pray for someone over a long time, you will also come to love them more.
Step 2: Build a Genuine Relationship
Don’t treat people as an “evangelism project.” People quickly notice when they are just a target. Love them as Jesus loves: care about their lives, be there when they need you, and remain their friend even if they don’t believe yet. A relationship without ulterior motives is the strongest foundation for the journey of building trust.
Step 3: Walk With Them Patiently Over Time
The journey of building trust is rarely a one-time thing. Some people need years, with many questions and many life events, before they are ready to receive the Lord. Patiently walk with them through good times and bad. Don’t push, and don’t give up. The timing belongs to God.
Step 4: Live With Integrity and Transparency
“In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
– Matthew 5:16 (BSB)
In the journey of building trust, your life speaks louder than your words. People may argue with what you say, but it is hard to deny an upright life. If you ever do wrong in front of them, have the courage to admit it and apologize. That humility is also a testimony. Honesty at work, keeping promises, avoiding deceit and selfishness: these are wordless sermons that unbelievers watch every day.
When You Have the Chance to Talk About God
At some point on the journey of building trust, a door will open. It may come when the person faces a major crisis, or simply through a sudden question: “Why do you believe in God?” Then tell your own story: how God met you, how He made you new and how you have come through trials because of Him. A sincere testimony often touches hearts more than many arguments.
Keep the focus on Jesus and salvation in Him. Don’t let denominational debates or divisive topics overshadow what matters most. Listen before you speak, respect the other person’s views, and live joyfully and generously so they can see God’s peace in you.
“But in your hearts sanctify Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give a defense to everyone who asks you the reason for the hope that is in you. But respond with gentleness and respect.”
– 1 Peter 3:15 (BSB)
Start the Journey of Building Trust Today
Evangelism is not only talking about God, but living with God in front of others. The journey of building trust may be long, but every small step matters: a prayer, a phone call to check in, an act of kindness. When you are faithful, God will open the door at the time He has set.
This week, choose one relative or friend who doesn’t know God. Pray for that person every day, and look for a chance to meet or help them.
Lord, place in my heart a real love for the people close to me who don’t yet know You. Help me live uprightly, patiently and ready to testify about You when the chance comes. Please open their hearts Yourself. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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